I am currently going through another one of my setbacks in my anxiety and here is how I experience them. I am usually going along with my life just fine then wham I'm in a setback. I usually get setbacks that affect my sleep somehow. This time around is no different. I am experiencing insomnia every second night for the last week. I just can't seem to sleep until around 3.30am or 4am. I sleep then until about 9am which is actually a good amount of sleep however I am usually anxious before I sleep and therefore the quality of sleep would not be great.
I experience thoughts going around in my head for example "oh no it is 2.30am and I am still not a sleep" or I would go to bed, do my diary, read my book etc. whatever I usually do and then lie down and my thoughts would go to something like "oh no I'm lying down 30 mins now and I'm not even near sleeping"
These are my trigger thoughts. On a normal night I would not care about the sleep but when I am having a setback it is all I seem to care about at that time. I am doing things to help me. I am redoing a course I finished a few months ago on anxiety. It is facilitated by Aware using the silvercloud platform and it is self paced and free. I also try and type in how I feel on the mental health forum called turn2me. It is basically a social network, where you are anonymous and can check in at certain times with how you are feeling and join text chat groups on different topics such as "Tips on how to manage anxiety" which are facilitated by a turn2me volunteer. The things you post can be private where only you can see it or public where others can comment on your post with helpful advice. I also talk to my family and especially my brother a lot.
What makes this setback different than all the rest is that I am a stronger person now and I realise that I can do a lot of things even on little sleep. I try not to let lack of sleep or tiredness dictate me. I felt frustrated and a bit emotional this morning because I felt that this is never doing to end but I know from past experiences that it will end. I know what I need to do and setbacks are a good thing and will happen in recovery.
I have a tendency to do things like what I mentioned above with Aware and turn2me etc. until I feel better and then stop but I really should be doing it on a regular basis to help me on the road to recovery.
I wanted to do this post to help others but also to help myself because I feel better when I type out what is making me anxious rather than talk to a stranger. That reminds me I also will be using the Samaritans. They can be both rang on 116123 or emailed which is what I aim to do.
Right now I am good but I know I am still in the setback a little. I know I will get through it as I always do but I just wanted to share my experience.
I hope to do an update soon again.
Thanks for reading please share and comment below. What are setbacks like for you and what helps you through them?
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